The Silliest Autobiography in the World – Winning Story

Like Dickens, I was born, except without a caul. Whether or not I am the heroine of my own story is for you to decide.
In 2012, I moved from Magnolia, Texas to Mumbai, India; that’s when the silliness started. My days were filled with futile attempts to hear the difference between d se darawaja and dh se dhan. Having failed miserably, I instead began reading books that taught me the difference between MC and BC. Now, I can swear fluently in Hindi, but I can’t tell a rickshaw driver how to get to my hotel.
In 2015, I relocated to Seoul, Korea, where I finally learned to make perfectly round, slightly chewy chapati. I used the chapati to make tacos in an attempt to appropriate two cultures while living in a third. Because Murica!
My friends have even bestowed upon me the dubious title of Grand Cuisiniere of Radial Breads.
It’s true.
I swear.
There’s even a certificate.
These days, I frequent Seoul’s ubiquitous coffee shops, where I’m pretending to write my book. In reality, I’m trolling publishers on Twitter and ardently defending the literary merits of a certain banker-turned-bestseller whose last name begins with a B.

By – Jean

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